omgcd

I am sick to death of hearing the Mario theme tune. Catchy, quirky and crucially memorable, the accompaniment to the pixel plummer’s early adventures has become something of a byword for quirk. In the mainstream news media and the like adults above the age of thirty tend only to know video games as either bleep bloop colourful platformers or insanely popular childhood stealing behemoths like Call of Duty or World of Warcraft. But it is not the obsession with online jockish buffoonery that really pisses me off, it’s the kooky-by-numbers insert-fun-loving-personality-here trendy backward looking generation of idiotic, t-shirt slogan wearing fuckwits who swear that despite the fact that they weren’t even born when Mario and Sonic were being widely played the idea of sitting trawling through tremendously dated video games is the height of cool.

Why are Mario and Sonic so damn popular? Are we really experiencing such a dearth of artistic creativity that the most popular figures of such an incredibly interesting, varied and modern art form are almost thirty years old? It’s like Ok magazine being filled with pictures of Kurt Russel and Grace Jones.

Don’t you have enough Nathan Drakes, Marcus Pheonixes, Sackboys and girls to have your own generational identity? Just as long as you stay away from Crash and Spyro.